08 April, 2013

BIG SHOT BIRTHDAYS_ John Schneider (Bo Duke on The Dukes of Hazzard) is 53; Survivor winner Richard Hatch is 52; Robin Wright (House of Cards) is 47; Taylor Kitsch (Battleship, John Carter) is 32

EVIL DEAD REMAKE SCARES UP $30.5 MILLION _ The remake of 1981 cult classic Evil Dead won the box office over the weekend, taking in $26 million.

NUMBER FOR THE DAY _ 31,260: Messages posted to Twitter by the late Roger Ebert.

NEWS ATTACK! _ The American Laughing Championship was held Sunday in San Diego. [It was all fun and games to one contestant grossed everyone out by breaking his leg.]

WALMART WORKER HONORED FOR RETURNING CASH LEFT IN CART _ Bismark Mensah has been awarded the Integrity in Action Award by his employer, Walmart. Last October he was collecting carts outside a Federal Way, Washington, Walmart and found a white envelope stuffed with $20,000. He turned it in to his manager and the owner got it all back. Bismark could have used the money. He'd arrived in the U.S. from Ghana just eight months before.

BAGGAGE HANDLER ACCUSED OF STEALING $84K IN BELONGINGS _ A Minneapolis-St. Paul airport baggage handler was busted last week after prosecutors say he was caught on tape stealing valuables from the bags of passengers. David Vang allegedly walked away with $84,000 worth of passengers' belongings over an eight month period. Guns, jewelry and watches were among the items prosecutors say he stuffed into his backpack.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: WOMAN CLAIMS SHE HAD FIVE FUNERALS _So maybe you've done this. You really, REALLY need a couple of days off, but you have no vacation left. You're not sick, so you pull the old "my great aunt died" scam. A British social worker lied her way to 66 days of bereavement leave, concocting death stories about five people in her life. She said her ex-husband had hanged himself, her mother died in surgery, and her brother, aunt and uncle had died within a week.